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Where has my Marmalade gone?

Posted: Mon Nov 20, 2023 10:30 am
by Wilhelm
I'm looking for my dog, Marmalade. He's the sweetest little dog a boy could wish for. I love my dog Marmalade so very much, but he's run off!
I was taking Marmalade for a walk in the park when I spotted a balloon-man selling balloons. My little sister just loves balloons, and I had some of my pocket money left over, so I thought I'd buy one. When the Italian balloon-man went to take payment and hand over a lovely blue balloon, I let go of the leash and Marmalade suddenly bolted! I think he must have spotted another animal and went to chase it!

He's just the most wonderful dog. He's a brown sort of colour. He's missing his ear. He's missing an eye. He's also missing some teeth and one of his legs. He's missing some spots of his coat here and there. He's also missing his tail. He also has an illness in his private parts which makes him leak a foul-smelling fluid wherever he goes. He gets very excited and jumps up to meet you even if you protest! He can be a bit naughty and sometimes eats his own droppings and that of other dogs. He will come running if you shout his name: "Here! Marmalade!"

Please help me find my dog, Marmalade. It's almost suppertime and father will give me a real thrashing if I come home without Marmalade.

Re: Where has my Marmalade gone?

Posted: Mon Nov 20, 2023 10:38 am
by Wilhelm
He normally comes to his master when he hears his name. He's never run off like this before.

Re: Where has my Marmalade gone?

Posted: Mon Nov 20, 2023 10:59 am
by Meru
Sorry about your dog but little kids aren't allowed on the forum. Ban this bitch.

Re: Where has my Marmalade gone?

Posted: Mon Nov 20, 2023 3:02 pm
by ArhumMK51
he's dead

Re: Where has my Marmalade gone?

Posted: Tue Nov 21, 2023 10:00 pm
by Wilhelm
Supper must nearly be ready by now. Oh, where is that dog!

Re: Where has my Marmalade gone?

Posted: Tue Nov 21, 2023 10:03 pm
by The Invisible Hand

Re: Where has my Marmalade gone?

Posted: Tue Nov 21, 2023 10:13 pm
by Wilhelm
Oh, thank you sir! I thought I'd never be reunited with my Marmalade. Yes, that was him alright. But he's run off again! And just when I'd found him! Oh, I could cry!

Re: Where has my Marmalade gone?

Posted: Tue Nov 21, 2023 11:44 pm
by Meru
Its unacceptable that the forum now has a filthy, possibly dangerous mutt running all over the place causing havoc. How was this allowed to happen? Young man, take some responsibility and get your animal under control before I call a professional to do it for you.

Re: Where has my Marmalade gone?

Posted: Tue Nov 21, 2023 11:45 pm
by Meru
I've already ordered dog poison as a precaution with next-day delivery.

Re: Where has my Marmalade gone?

Posted: Tue Nov 21, 2023 11:50 pm
by Meru
Meru wrote: Tue Nov 21, 2023 11:45 pm I've already ordered dog poison as a precaution with next-day delivery.
I'll poison Marmalade